International Adoption Book

Thursday, October 9, 2008

To My Biological Mom...

This evening a dear, and long time, friend is flying in from Texas. So I set the kids to drawing a life-sized picture of themselves. The kids lay down on the long sheet of paper that was given to me by my beloved family (you know who you are... Thanks) and I traced them. The kids then began coloring themselves and adding their features. Somewhere along the way M got sidetracked. He cut out a tiny 2" by 2" slip of paper from his drawing and drew a stick figure carrying another stick figure with a circle wrapped around the smaller of the two. He walked up to me, reverently carrying his drawing.

M asked, "Mom, how you write 'Dear Mom, I miss you'?"

"What for, Son," I asked?

"How you write it? I want to write it for my mom." Showing me his paper I finally figured out what he had done and wanted to do...

M had drawn a picture of his biological mother holding him as an infant, wrapped in a blanket. He had made this picture just for her. Nearly in tears, I walked him through the sentence. When we were done, he asked me to write the following:

"To: Biological Mom
From: M____
remember (he meant that he hopes she remembers him and holding him)"
10-10-08 (though he didn't request it, I wrote the date)

Once we were finished he picked up the paper and made a beeline for the front door. When I asked him where he was headed he firmly told me, "To send off my letter."

I asked, "You mean you want to send it in the air so the wind takes it to your biological mom?"

"Yes!" he emphatically affirmed.

"Son, why don't you let Mommy do that for you. You can stay inside and finish coloring your picture for Aunt Kim-Berly and Uncle Tracy."

Thankfully he allowed me to do this. Unfortunately, as soon as I finished sending it off in the wind (a.k.a. sticking it into my back pocket) he freaked out and begged for it back. This made me a bit concerned, but I swiftly took it out of my pocket and handed it to him, claiming that it had only gone as far as our neighbor's house. He had decided to wait until he was 18 to give it to her.

Throughout the past 3 years or so (since beginning the adoption process for C) M has been very curious about his birth mom. He's wanted to find her and track her down on occassion. So, we've had to explain to him that we cannot legally look for her until he is 18 years old, at which point we will emphatically help him search for her. Though he doesn't like that answer, he accepts it. I think he recalled what we've told him and changed his mind about sending the paper (which is shown here).


Heather said...

Oh, that must just make your heart ache for him.
Heather BT

Carol and Taylor said...

Not much makes me cry. this did. What a sweet boy.

blessedmomto7 said...

That is so precious. I can't say I know how he feels. I was adopted, always knew I was adopted and never desired to meet my bio family. At age 26, they found me. He seems to be needing something? My kids have never expressed this either? I don't know how to help except to pray. God bless!

Mom 2 Joe and LilyRose said...

Ok, that made me cry.

Manette, you give that sweet boy a big kiss and hug from me.

Hope all is well. Talk with you soon.


Manette said...

Thank you, everyone, for your sweet comments... M certainly loves his birth parents. I continue to nourish those feelings in the hope of giving him some kind of connection to them.
Lots of love to all,

Anonymous said...

What a sweet boy he is.. and what a wonderful mommy you are. Hugs to you both.

Journey to Mia said...

What a sweetie.